tax cut

organic, originally uploaded by Justin Davis Davanzo.

good, now I can go shopping at Whole Foods and buy that piece of fish i've been wanting.

ahhhh...saturday...a day off...what to do? not sure yet. bike ride?
loaf? take pictures? be creative? watch a movie? write? clean the house? walk? nap? play music? ride a motorcycle? drink more coffee? call my friends? shop? sit in the sun? eat? cook? laugh? mope? people watch? wash the car? ski? star into nothing? eat pizza? drink beer? wander? wonder? wish? laugh.


hmmmm....


love and understanding.

making sense

lonesome work, originally uploaded by Justin Davis Davanzo.

"stop making sense"
-Talking Heads

yep...stop making sense...ok..so what does it all mean anyway?
all this meaning in the world...all our defining jobs, titles, things we own...
what does it all mean? I am not sure.

if we all got up in the morning and were not defined by the exterior world what would we be? It would be tough to do this of course, but i find myself walking to work at times, and really enjoying the simplicity of this activity, and wondering what makes our life meaningful...of course the given things like family, love, friends etc..of course...but beyond that...what is it each day that makes us move and gives us meaning? I suppose depending on where you live this may be a different answer...and this is not something i have the answer to by the way, I am just begging the question...for us...some days I am content to do nothing and say very little and other days I want to do a million things all at once. I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up and I still like to play.

point being, in the simplicity of life, what makes sense to you? What things are important to you? I don't think they need to be profound, just real...on the journey to make our lives more meaningful, i think we search for things that others say are important and that is what I'd like to not do...but that is not easy....

The road less travelled...i think that is important...

Love and Understanding.

beacon

last stand, originally uploaded by Justin Davis Davanzo.

i took this shot with my point and shoot a while back in Winter Park during a pretty good snow storm...I am not sure why, but this image is a strong one for me...maybe because today i am feeling tired and a bit lazy and i really don't want to go outside in the strong wind today...the wind...Boulder has a habit of getting super windy..i mean gust of wind that will blow you in the direction that they want to...you don't have a whole lot of choice, and I feel myself getting annoyed by it and not wanting to allow it to happen...oh damn..there it is again, a good analogy for our daily life. The winds of life. I know I am not the first one to talk about this, or write a song about it, or allude to it, so there. I think of all things in nature, i like wind the least...they say it makes people crazy..The Santa Ana winds back in California...i think they called them the Devil Winds...it was always a time for weird things....fires were stared, people acted strange...i feel that way here too....The wind does what it wants.

here are some things i love to do in life, but don't like doing in the wind.
Skiing
Riding my bike
Riding my motorcycle
Standing on the beach
Surfing
Walking
Trying to light a fire when you are stranded in the wilderness
Sailing on the ocean with a torn sail
Standing on the edge of a very tall mountain and the wind is at your back blowing you towards the edge.

ok..it sounds like i am complaining..and i am...
so here are some things that might be fun in the wind....

Flying a kite!
Windsurfing
Sailing a proper boat
Hang Gliding?
Sending a smoke signal
Riding a bike when the wind is behind you!
Having gas in a crowd...(the wind will confuse the situation)
Being a Tree...

So, the wind is a metaphor for things that mostly are not fun for me...
I don't windsurf, and i throw up at the thought of sailing, and Hang Gliding just seems, well, scary...i do enjoy gas...so you see....
The wind is a proper nuisance for me. What can i learn from this?

Ahhh....well, i think the wind is probably a good teacher for patience, strength, trust, and knowing when to say when...It is probably a control thing for me. If i am riding my bike in the wind, I can't do what I want all the time...There have been times on a motorcycle trip when the wind was so strong that I was almost blown off the road at 80 mph...not fun...so finding a way to relax into the wind and using the wind for our own is the key...like a falling leaf...or the trees ( and this one is the best analogy of all...Thanks to Tita) Look at the trees when it is windy and imagine that for them they probably love the wind...it gets them moving and dancing and swaying and cleans out there dead leaves...they sing in the wind and howl and lean in directions that they usually don't...so, for once, maybe I can go outside and enjoy the wind for their sake....after all...It is not really my place to complain anyway...they have been here alot longer than I.

Today I will face the wind with a smile and (kiddies, make sure to do this with some sort of eye protection) watch the trees dance.

Love and Understanding.

cliche i know

jd, originally uploaded by hoatzin66.

but hey...why not...actually my cousin Madison did this for me...nice work buddy. I think I could run for president for sure eh?

Ahh the whim of time and season. I realized i hadn't sat down here for a bit and then someone reminded me that they look forward to it every day and that was really important to hear. This is the one thing I get to do during the day that is quiet and private and peaceful, yet it is also shared with you.

so as i write today, i realize that i will be 37 years old in less than a month..huh? i mean, come on...just yesterday i was walking off my high school campus vowing to buck the system and never do anything that my parents wanted me to...(ok, a bit extreme, but good for the point), but I can remember all of this as if it were yesterday and as I think about this year and how many amazing things are going on and have yet to occur it is incredible how full life is..every day. This year especially...New jobs, healthy knees, planning a wedding, the wedding, the honeymoon, art shows, plays , graduation, bike riding, skiing, writing a book, making music, being with family more often, a black president, learning how to snowboard, new friends....just to name a few...i mean, really, this is what it is all about...we constantly try to remember that this life is our adventure and we can do whatever we want. Sure, there are times when we must be "practical" (throw up and cringe) and make sure we take care of business (early tax returns are nice), but for the most part, this is our palette and we can paint in any color, shape, size and at any time we want...this is something for all of us to remember, and rejoice in and continue to push ourselves in the direction of the life we want to lead. Of course, sometimes easier said than done.

I sometimes feel overwhelmed with all the things going on around so fast, that it takes time to slow them down and make the list and give each one the attention they deserve...but life is not waiting and so we must be efficient in our ways of living.

(here i go again..self preaching and spouting off)

i can't help it...but the truth is this...I want to continue to live each day as best i can and enjoy all the moments of this life. My family, my new family, my wife to be, my art, my quiet moments, my angry moments, my sad moments, my moments of despair, my doubt, my joy, my excitement, my freedom, my health, my creativity...all moments...

remember what my little friend taught us....

"what was your favorite run today?"

"This one."


This one.....



Love and Understanding

creative interpretations

and so i listen to Elizabeth Gilbert this morning giving a talk on TED.com...a link my mom sent me..she is talking about creative genius and how it all works....the funny thing is, here we all are, creative beings, struggling to explain our talents, our fears and our existence, and believing we are put here to do this work.   She believes that we are not a product of our own genius, but that of divine muse and fairies and thunderous trains of inspiration and I too feel that as part of this process...as I continue to work on my book, albeit sometimes much slower than i would like, I see the creative muse being tricky and coming in and out during times when we can't quite use them...inconvenient moments of flashed thoughts that occur right in the middle of something mundane and then they are gone...the pressure we put on ourselves to hold on tight to them and use them instead of allowing them to flow through us when we decide that they should.  This creative process of work and purpose.  As Elizabeth says, we have witnessed so many creative souls that are seemingly mad and suffering and dying to soon...that is the place we have somehow equated with great art....that is what i write about now and through my process.  I don't believe in the suffering and the despair of creativity.  I believe in the work, but not the idea that it should kill us and make us dark and withdrawn.  It should be celebrated and we should shout out with vibrant ferocity.  This is our place in the world.  We were born with bigger ears to hear notes, or strong eyes to see things others can't, or minds that hear words from the desert, and we must embrace them as an athlete embraces their height, size and skill.

we are athletes of the creative ranks and for all intesive purposes, our contracts should be in the millions and we should be traded and they should change the Super Bowl to the Super Show and we could all be in it every year.  This is our journey on a daily basis and it is sometimes a  hard one, but it should not be one that we struggle to live with.  it should be one that we strive to live with.

"The divine cockeyed genius assigned to your case...."  these are her words, but wow do they ring true.  If you think of your own creative gift as a character who was assigned to you, it makes sense...i see them as the Shakespearean clowns who grace the stage with a purpose that few recognize, but they are there to remind us what this is all about.  So here is to all of our "cockeyed geniuses"....let them play on your stage.

Love and Understanding.

morning

ok..i am a bit tired this morning...moving slow and waking up bit by bit. This winter is a strange one....much milder than last year, although my mind is foggy with my knee surgery from last year and I wonder if it just felt harder. At this time last year i was on the couch recovering from knee surgery...wow...amazing how time goes by and when I think of how lucky i am this year to be out and about and skiing and working and having fun i am reminded of how important it is to appreciate it all. so i got up earlier than i wanted to. My new work schedule has me working until 10:30 and not really going to bed until 12:30 or 1 so i usually sleep till 8:30 anyway, but sometimes i just feel more tired than i think i should. not sure if it is the idea of work that makes me tired sometimes or the overwhelming coziness of my bed that makes me tired. nonetheless, if I look back on things it gets my attention and has me up and about making sure I don't waste too much time sleeping...a good 8 hours for me...until kids come along, i'll take it. all of this adds up to a whirlwind feeling sometimes...wanting to accomplish so many things each week, and having to make lists and pick them off with a slower more methodical purpose...giving myslef permission to not have to do it ALL right now. That is the big challenge these days. I want to do it all, write my book, be in plays, work on my photography, ride my bike, travel. So i am reminded by my soul mate that we have a long time ahead of us to do it all and so I sit back and feel cozy about that. there is no magic clock ticking telling me i have two weeks left to create, but I am aware that time is going by and as long as I am doing the things i enjoy, that is what is important. So i will continue to make small gains in all my creative endeavors and make sure that I pay attention to the days and what they have in store. Love and Understanding.

manifest things

gs2, originally uploaded by Justin Davis Davanzo.

when i was young i used to practice the power of manifestation. The way it worked is I would find a sticky pad with about 50 notes on it and start writing the thing I want most...( mom will remember this one ) They were usually big ticket items like dogs, bikes, games etc...i would write it out on each note and begin my mind tricks...by placing those notes all over the house, in the cabinets, drawers, fridge, bathrooms...anywhere I knew they would be found the message would be conveyed. Now, obviously at that time my universe was my mom and dad, so at some point they would give in or say No...but i didn't give up easy and many times it would present itself in one way or another. I can't say that this was the most spiritual approach but it taught me to be focused and to use the power of the mind.

in my adult life i continue to manifest things in life...it is a pattern i have had for a long time and I can look back and remember certain times where it was very key to life...like manifesting Marco my dog, or my first motorcycle, or winning a trip to Mexico...here is how it works.

I will begin with a small idea, or desire, or want...it is usually something i know i want in life (and they aren't always some life changing event or thing) but they are things that I know would make me happy...I begin to think about this thing, at first a little, but then it becomes something that I research, and look at. I start asking myself how I could afford it..what would I have to do? Then, here comes the big one...i start talking about it...to family, friends, strangers...I keep pushing this idea mentally and physically in my focal mind. The other key for me, is i don't worry about how it will come to me. In other words, I don't immediately ruin the possibility by saying I can't afford it, monetarily or spiritually...i don't let that get in the way. I trust that it will show up at the right moment and things will align...

Why do I say this today?? for a few reasons...I notice myself doing this more often in the last 2 years and see it working...One huge catalyst was the decision to move and change my life...i wasn't sure about the outcome, but knew that it had to be put in motion...

I believe in this stuff...not from a hocus pocus place, but from an energetic place...if you want something and you focus on it and believe, it will come to you...no matter what it might be, it just depends on your energetic desire.

For example...( and this is a small one) i love motorcycles...they make me happy...i sold my last one a year ago and find myself fixed on the next one...so I manifest the fact that it will show up...as a matter of fact, the picture is key today...one way to manifest...visual manifestation.

I am working on this for other things too...the wedding, a house, my photography...the important thing is, you have to be patient and it ties in a bit to yesterday's blog...you have to put the ships out, but this is all manifesting power...

Besides, i know this works...i woke up and manifested my coffee this morning...so there.

try it if you haven't already...


Love and Understanding

planning

urban planning, originally uploaded by Justin Davis Davanzo.

so much planning to do...sometimes it seems that all we do in life is plan for things...plan plan plan...remember that saying though..."life is what happens when you are busy planning." Well, so there...a good thing to try and remember that no matter how hard we plan things will happen accordingly...a good lesson to remember when planning things like weddings, art shows, careers, your day....how important it is to remember that we can only do so much in the day and in our lives and the more we push and pull the harder it is and that idea of going with the flow is so important. Of course that doesn't mean not planning...it means putting things in motion and making the movement of an intention...sending ships out as one of my teachers used to say...you can't wait for your ship to come in when you haven't sent a ton out. If you send one ship out, chances are slim it will come back, but if you send 100 out, well, 50 might sink and 25 might sail to some other port, and 20 might get taken over by pirates, but 5 might make it back to you....with spices and things that are new and exciting and rewards unexpected.

So, each day I try and send a ship..sometimes it is a small boat, out to sea...and then I let it go and hope that i can track it and guess its voyage. Of course, this metaphor is not meant to create the illusion that all you do is send them out and wait...that is only the first step. Once they are gone, you need to keep building and designing better ships, and finding the crew and material to do so, and stocking them and making them sea worthy...a constant process i suppose.

Now, i am not a sailor and as a matter of fact i will throw up simply by stepping foot on a boat...not really, but almost...so this whole idea is even a bit more scary than i like to imagine. Why does it have to be ships? Couldn't it be a car? Or a motorcycle? or a space ship? no.

The ocean is life...unkown and deep and treacherous and ever changing...well, a little less these days with GPS, but you get my drift...no pun intended. That is life...When they sent the early explorers they didn't know if they would just fall off the end of the earth...they didn't...what a concept.

so, if you'll excuse me..i am going to finish swabbing the decks of the next ship that is set to leave today...i hope i see yours on the journey.

love and understanding.

the eye

blue wheat, originally uploaded by Justin Davis Davanzo.

I saw a deaf man speaking the other day and he had a lot to say.
I saw a homeless man who held a brown ragged sign that
was ripped on the edges and had misspellings but i knew that he
was cold and hungry.
I saw a man smile at me outside the market as he settled in to his
lunch on a sunlit day.
I saw a piece of paper ripped and torn and muddy on the sidewalk
with a grocery list half crossed off...onions, celery and diapers..
I saw a woman who lost her love just a few minutes ago
and a man who couldn't find his.
I saw wheat in the city blown by the wind and framed in blue tile.
I saw a lone shopping cart pushed up against the wall in a red world scorched with plastic.
I saw a metal pipe rusted and worn but full of purpose.

I saw myself in a window looking back,
I closed one eye and held my breathe and flicked a switch and stopped the time and moved through the last moment of that moment
with nothing more than a whim.

Mr and Miss Splendid

Wheel, originally uploaded by Justin Davis Davanzo.

today is a splendid day...sleeping in...drinking coffee...playing and writing and getting ready to go spend a few hours skiing..splendid. Looking outside it is splendid...blue sky, a bit cool, fresh air, quiet, splendid...i am splendid this morning...and she is splendid this morning and together we are Mr and Miss Splendid...spending the day together being splendid on a Sunday..Splendid Sunday...yes..that is what we'll call it.

Splendid Sunday is simply splendid and sweet and the kind of day you could have every day for the rest of your life...just like it...slow and simple and splendid and sweet and sumptuous and silly.

So...for today, the Splendid Couple will be more splendid than usual and sparkle and sing and play....


Love and Understanding.