Wednesday, October 7, 2009

The Road



The Road, originally uploaded by Justin Davis Davanzo.
as of late, i am feeling rather inspired and quite powerful. Powerful from the aspect of seeing things with every possibility and making them happen...i don't say this from a place of arrogant power mongering, but from a place of abundant expectation and love of what life deserves.

i was standing in my room last night and just had a feeling of not wanting to ever have any doubts or negative and fearful thoughts ever again...this does not mean that at times i wouldn't feel nervous and anxious, which is completely different than fearful and doubtful...nervous and anxious is what i feel before i go on stage and it makes me feel alive and ready for anything. Fear is what I feel when I stand on the edge of a mountain and it paralyzes me...i don't want to live in fear and doubt....(ok, so I may have to get up that mountain sooner or later and stand on the edge to prove this whole theory, but give me a little time!)

I think as children, if we imagine it possible then it should be something that just happens...or we just think that things are the way they are, not knowing that our parents have built in automatic trust so that we are taken care of...just like adults as we trust the universe to be our parents. It is the energy of knowing things will be ok and the energy of imagining and making things happen no matter what. As a child there was no limit to what we could do...if all we had were sticks and stones, we'd make them into something and have fun....think of all the games we would come up with...some simple, some complicated, but all were just part of the daily experience.

The last few weeks there have been so many amazing things coming together that i have to attribute it to simply believing...nothing more. I believe that we can live the life we want anytime we want. it is just a matter of making that decision. Truthfully, as I am realizing this, I also realize that I still don't have the most specific overall vision, but I am getting better at the visions on a daily basis and looking ahead a few months...i am not sure if looking ahead more than that is the right process as you need to be open for change and the ability to move and adapt, but making the decision to do so and being agile and purposeful is the key.

I feel like today i could write for hours and share 100's of anecdotes in the past month even that would illustrate this process...but i have things to do this morning that continue to move me forward. But, i will share one..a big one....one of the biggest.


It all started with Prairie Dogs. Nita and I spent hours on our road bikes this summer and there was one particular bike path that I loved to ride down because there were literally hundreds of chirping prairie dogs standing near their holes and watching us ride by. Sometimes they would waddle across the path tempting the front wheels of our bikes and other times they would just sit there eating and staring at us...i used to joke that when they stood up they looked like little bears.
Then one day Nita was on a ride by herself in the mountains and a black bear ran across the road in front of her...we laughed a bit, after marveling at the fact that she was so close to a bear, and I said, "gee, it seems like the bear is your totem, which must mean the prairie dog is mine." So the rest of the summer, whenever riding down that path, i would say hi to my totems and generally salute them with my own version of prairie dog speak. I even became obsessed with the YouTube Dramatic Prairie Dog and laughed my head off when watching it.

Flash forward a bit as I am working hard on getting another photo show up and running. I had been courting a cool clothing shop named Topo Ranch. For about 1 year I had occasionally gone in and talked to them about putting up work and having a show. Well, finally the time was right and I was able to meet with the owner and a show was put in the works. Now I had seen their sign and logo many times and not thought twice until Alex, the owner, sent me the logo on email so I could include it in a postcard announcing the show...and then WHAM...there it was....right in front of me....staring at me in the face....

My Totem!!! The Topo Ranch logo is a prarie dog standing up with wings...I will let this sink in....

I couldn't believe it...right there the whole time...my totem...I couldn't believe it...i laughed and exclaimed to Nita that it all made sense! It gets better though....Alex's family decedents were members of the Donnor Party and managed to not only survive, but they started a ranch in Central California that was over run with prairie dogs...so to honor his family, Alex used the spanish word Topo, for prairie dog, and gave it wings so his dream of owning and having these stores would take off....ok...so multiple prairie dog totems at work here...and now i must let you go as I have truly written a short story...but this is the thing....

At first I thought having a prairie dog for a totem was silly and not as cool as the bear....now i realize...flying prairie dogs are way cooler than sleeping bears....


Love and understanding!

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