ok...so I am going to be 38 years old this year...not sure why I awoke thinking about this, but maybe it has something to do with bad backs, moving and waiting for my internet connection to finally arrive...all seem tied to time and age and my excuse for not doing much of anything for the last 10 days or so. Having a bad back is like having a car with no wheels on it...its fun to sit in and turn the stereo on but where the hell can you go? yeah...that's like me with a bad back...
So three weeks ago, in the middle of the night my lower back went into some cosmic spasm which is probably related to the universe telling me i was lacking some sort of support...or something to that effect. I couldn't move or get up to pee even...i just laid there with my wife holding me half on and half off the bed feeling pretty helpless...just trying to breathe. I realized in that moment (as I do a few times a year when i am reminded of this) that we are very, very fragile and it doesn't take much to bring us down...now it takes alot to hold me down, but bringing me down is, well, pretty easy on some level. And this goes for the emotional and mental state as well...
Back to the back...so now, flash forward about a week or so and guess what? I get to move now...with a bad back. And so it goes and continues and the morning air is filled with cussing and moaning and some form of stretching if i can muster it. My wife, the young sweet thing that she is, reminds me to breathe and that things will get better. Yeah...well, where the hell is the cable guy?? Someone tell me that!
My back hurts, I just moved for a whole week and i have no internet!!
Oh and my birthday is coming up and I am going to be 38....well, in March, but soon...and then i'll be 40....WTF? LOL...LMAO (internet slang is the new thing i hear.)
So this morning as the sun rose, and I rolled over in bed and realized that for the first time in 3 weeks, my back didn't hurt, and that I didn't have to get up and coordinate moving anything, or swapping cars, or making appointments for utilities, and that I would be saved by the wizard himself...the man behind the curtain...the cable guy....(they are so under appreciated)...my day suddenly felt a little bit lighter. My coffee was warmer and sweeter, my toast was perfect and my OJ was just right...I realized that today, life would continue on its way with me in tow and on October 27th, 2009, I was still only 37 years old with plenty of days left to play before the ripe old age of 38....
for now, i'll be down in my studio, meditating in the internet sanctum of belonging and purpose.
Love and Understanding
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
The Blur
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4 comments:
Ah yes, aging, moving and back problems. Well since I am a few years older than you, I can tell you that the 40's are SO much better than 30's! And moving, well...just did that myself too and while it is a pain, isn't it nice to have a new place that you get to set up and put up art and all that fun stuff? As for the back...tried a chiropractor? Its done wonders for mine. Well I guess I had a lot to say today :)
Here's to feeling better!
Bad back? Ha. Wait until you have more hair growing out of your ears and nose than you do on top of your head. Or enjoying a good sneeze and realizing you just peed in your pants a little. And most of all, never, ever trust a fart.
Not that I know about any of this on a first hand basis.
I can always trust you Babbo for putting it all into perspective!
and Melissa..yes, the chiropractor did wonders for sure...went yesterday...
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