aftermath

Stand, originally uploaded by Justin Davis Davanzo.

wow...a year...one year..i remember last year like it was yesterday on Thanksgiving..usually i can't remember the previous years festivities, but I think this year was so drastically different that it was easy..different in so many ways..all of this is good, some of it means missing my family, but for the most part, this day was a perfectly divine and peaceful one and full of new family and persons that are amazing to be with. I am a lucky man for sure. I have had some time away from this blog (ha...like two days or something, but it seems like a long time...) I find myself so connected with my writing and thoughts that it is hard to contain them..I am working on my book each day and it is opening doors that are scary to walk through and thoughts that are sometimes not comfortable, but the process is like a blog on crack...and i like that...it forces you to have some direction, but also to let things go and really trust the process and not rely on the end product. I do not know how long it will be, how many pictures, or if it will be good...i do know that by doing it, i am freeing my inner thoughts on a new level...i have a huge respect for writers who actually tell a story and for writers who have the courage to write at all...and for all those that have come before me and paved the way with bravery and courage to write...(Swirly gets special props on this one!!) All of this..the pieces of the puzzle, the challenge, the journey..it is what delights me and scares the crap out of me...so there. I had to write today because i missed it....

Love and Understanding.

Turkey Day

olive, originally uploaded by Justin Davis Davanzo.

Happy Thanksgiving!!! I hope your day is Full and Bountiful.

Love and Understanding.

van gogh

van gogh, originally uploaded by Justin Davis Davanzo.

I am on a journey...i may not write frequently for the moment...i will do my best, but my energy is being put into my book....which this picture serves as a preview....I shall be here still...

love and understanding

time flies

broken, originally uploaded by Justin Davis Davanzo.

I was thinking about how fast this year has gone...wow. it really is amazing how many things can change in a year. At this time last year I was still living in Santa Monica and staying in my dad' house with a storage POD full of my stuff, and only a plan to move to Boulder...no job, not sure of anything...when you really think about it and break it down to 365 days it sounds pretty strange...how many days there actually are in a year and what you did in those days to get to the next year. I was on a long ride yesterday alone marveling at the world around me, the beauty and the difference in my life that i live now...a silly one came to mind..I was riding north on a road that is similar to the Pacific Coast Highway, in that it is a main link from north to south here in Boulder, but instead of ending up in Malibu, it ends up in Lyons, a great little town, and instead of riding north with the ocean on my left, i have the Rocky Mountains on my left...just as majestic...on the right though, is a vast picture of open country, cows, farms, fields, trees with no leaves...that side is very different from the Santa Monica Mountains that would be on my right while riding north to Malibu. I found myself rejoicing and reminiscing at the same time. The amazing thing is that riding the bike is the huge common thread that I can relate my life to and in the end, it doesn't really matter where I am riding...it makes me happy. So a year ago, i might have been riding up the coast, but yesterday I was riding up the range....cool.

of course there are bigger things to this wandering about time...my incredible wife to be who is loving me and supporting me through all of my journey, my health, my job, my art...i think remembering that a year is packed with so many changes that it is almost silly to ever worry about what will be next year...life is change, and if you believe your path is good and right, the journey will change with the seasons and give you all the things that you wished for.

love and understanding

False Start

wood and metal, originally uploaded by Justin Davis Davanzo.

so this winter seemingly has had a false start and the weather is just fine, as if it were early summer...amazing and warm. So today i will get to ride my bike as if it were that time of year and enjoy the fresh air with some sun on my skin...

today is one of those days when waking up my mind is quiet with not much to think or say...i don't know if that is a peaceful feeling or just a blank slate for the moment...not sure, but i do feel a slight stirring of things that need to be done and thought and created....but for now, they are content to still be sleeping i think. I have practiced each day by doing something, sometimes big, sometimes small, for my art...an email to a contest, or beginning to work on more pictures, taking pictures, reading, writing...something anything, no matter how small...and then rewarding my mind with that moment for the day and giving permission to not have to write the 9th Symphony every day.
All the small things are what add up and make the big things matter...

all the small things add up.

maybe you do use math in this life...


Love and Understanding

the flying tractor

oh to fly, originally uploaded by Justin Davis Davanzo.

what? its not so crazy...i mean who the heck would have imagined that that we could fly in the first place? Or that we could actually go to space? or invent a computer that was a phone too? I mean really...who the heck thought of this stuff? So we have proof that anything is possible these days...an African American President, bikes with 21 speeds not just 10, cars that run on electricity...whoa...electricity? think about that one...someone thought up and figured out how to harness electricity...how many light bulbs have you screwed in during your life and never thought about that one? I know I don't think about it. Or matches? or Bounce dryer sheets...(love it), or shovels...Leaf blowers...loud, yes, but a heck of alot faster than a rake..I think today I will try and notice all the things that without, our lives would be vastly different..not worse, or better or easier or harder, just different...

I am sure for every one thing invented there are 1000 items that didn't quite make the grade..like my flying tractor here..one, the propeller is a bit small and two, well, it could use some wings..but they were thinking outside of the box at least...why we would use a flying tractor i haven't quite figured out yet.

My point this morning is that as an artist, we may be inventing 1000 pieces of work before one of them gets noticed, or bought, or put in a show, or even appreciated...Van Gogh sold one painting 7 years into his 10 year painting career...one...and he is Van Gogh...

so i say, keep trying to get tractors to fly..because strange things happen, and when someone says, "yeah, when monkeys fly out of my butt", stand back and have some bananas ready, because they just might be in for a surprise....Now when pigs start flying, we may want to be a bit more careful.

Love and Understanding.

Caution

duty, originally uploaded by Justin Davis Davanzo.

ok...so this is what it is...La Resistance. The last few days i have been feeling...well, i don't even really know..lazy, unmotivated, not willing to do anything...lost in a world of not knowing what i should be doing, and then it hit me...THIS is it, this is the part that we all talk about, the resistance of going onward and forward...I am not sure how it suddenly came on, but boy was it strong, and it still is, but literally when I laid out a grand plan of major creative endeavors I stopped dead in my tracks...the resistance movement was suddenly upon me. The kind where you question all the things you are doing and have done and want to do...but this time is different. This time i recognize it for what it is..not a confusion of lost will or creative stupor, no, a battle within that I will not lose. I suppose in my life this has happened many times and I just thought it was my way of knowing when I should move on and try other things and then i think of all the times I stopped trying because the resistance tricked me....wow. ok well this time, i see it for what it is and realize that it is ok to have some down days and some thoughts, but the reality is, there is no way I can let the resistance bury my bold and courageous battle for creative might and victory...sure, it can try, but it will not win or draw me off into another world....Maybe that is why i like taking pictures of things like cones...little soldiers in an impossible landscape that seem to have their purpose down pat..."Caution"...oh...i get it, that cone wants me to pay attention to something near by so i don't do damage to myself or the things around it. Hmmm...maybe we need our own mental cones that get put out in our brain and tell us that we approaching a "resistance zone" up ahead and to slow down and pay attention so we don't crash into anything...kind of like the sign i see in the winter..one of my favorites..."Ice may exist" You know, they aren't sure, but there is a possibility that ice is around the corner and if you don't slow down...zip...off the road you will go...so they put the sign there to remind you no matter what.. So, "Resistance May Exist" ...aha...good, i am glad someone pointed that out so I can be aware, take a moment, and make my way through it to the other side. I may even make a shirt...yeah..that is a good idea...."Resistance May Exist"

Time to get back on my horse and ride.


love and understanding

Snow

The first snow...finally!....i feel like a little kid.

We're going out for a walk and getting some coffee...

snow...

love and understanding.

yum

panzetta, originally uploaded by Justin Davis Davanzo.

it is so easy to get overwhelmed with the many things we have to do and want to do every day in life...there are just too many things on the plate. Like the plate in the picture though, it may seem like a bunch of random things thrown together, but really, it has been carefully prepared, planned and thought out and in the end this will be an empty plate because it is so tasty..but only because all the things on the plate were meant to be there and they all made friends with the other things on the plate and their juices came together and mixed and melted and became one...making the ultimate outcome a taste extravaganza..sort of like our daily life with all the things on our plates..all the things that make up our daily moments and experiences that will propel us down the path we want to be on and the delicious walk of life that is full of all things creative, confusing, overwhelming, difficult to understand, tiring, joyful...they will all come together and create the perfect blend of life that will taste just the way it is meant to taste through careful design (that of which we are not fully aware of) and it will happen over and over and over...I like to call it "A big dish of overwhelmed pie"....so, next time you feel overwhelmed, make sure to check the oven and take a big wiff of the ingredients cooking slowly (ok, if you are having a shitty day at this point, something is for sure needing to be adjusted) and remember that in the end, it was all part of the grand plan in the cook book of life...page 293..mark it with one of those string things attached to the cookbook so you don't lose your place and then you can cook that dish over and over when ever you want...mmmm....i like the sound of it .

love and understanding.

cooking

Today I am cooking...i am cleaning...i am in my Utopia

What I will cook is a surprise

I have begun my journey with Van Gogh.

I am only able to lift a fallen leaf

and grasp it with a soft touch

the brittleness complete and ready

to disintegrate...

to blow away in the wind

and leave things bare and brown and gray.

I smelled toast this morning on a road

while riding a bike in the cold air

wafting through me with a curiosity 

that brought me to this day..

a toast and Van Gogh day.

A day when I planned to conquer the world.

Love and Understanding.

that time of year

warm, originally uploaded by Justin Davis Davanzo.

the last few days have been interesting...i think it is that time of year..a sort of in between place..the changing of the guard and seasons and for me i tend to think about all the things i could be, want to do, want to be, have been, have had, will have, want...you get the picture. I again have returned to the idea that I am first and foremost, a creative being, and if I can't create, I am not happy.

This triggers grand ideas of writing a book, or making a movie, or being in another play. The syndrome of wanting to do so many things at once that you can't even start one thing. I sometimes sit on the edge of the bed and wonder what it would be like to just be a writer...or just be a photographer...you know...I think having those thoughts are a good thing as it keeps us sharp and grounded so we can keep our strength about us and make sure we are doing the things we want to be doing. The life of an artist. It is so different from that of someone wanting to be a doctor, for example. I suppose there are many choices within those fields of wanting to be a doctor, but at some point you will become a doctor of something, which is an amazing feat. I am not saying doctors aren't creative by the way. My point being, that as a creative person, and by that i mean someone who MUST be creative in there life's work, there are many ways to be distracted and many things to find creative. I for one, love many different art forms and wish i could be all of them.
A rock star
A published author
A well known actor
A recognized photographer
A music composer
A famous chef

Now..if I look at my list, ( and there are many other things to add, but i'll keep it simple...) i am all those things in my mind already, but the idea of really making my life about that is the challenge and is the Grand Canyon of creativity at times...you know, standing on the edge of that and wondering how it will look from the other side...and as my favorite quote, the one that helped me start this blog, the one from Mr. Bradbury, always reminds me...if you stand there too long, you will never learn to fly..so jump and grow the wings on the way down...a constant reminder to do so.

So look for my new CD coming out, which, after reading my new book you'll find a discount card for it, but only if you see the new movie I am in, and after you visit my photo show, where you'll here some theme music for a movie i wrote, and afterwards, make sure you stop by my restaurant for some amazing yummy comfort food...the kind that makes you eat slow and utter sounds only...

Love and Understanding.

wow

Old Glory, originally uploaded by Justin Davis Davanzo.

and so it is...the changing of the guard. We sat at home last night and thought about the historical elements of this day....I still can't quite grasp it in its fullness yet, but I felt an immediate sense of accomplishment and breathed a sigh of relief in knowing that there had been an overwhelming call for change. My good friend Luke mentioned that he hoped we wouldn't suffer from the ridiculous "not my president" syndrome and that everyone could begin to make an effort and put aside our different beliefs etc...I couldn't agree more. I was angry when watching a small bit of McCain's speech, which i think was possibly his most eloquent and best yet, as the crowd hissed and boo'd at the mention of Obama as a president...get it together people and start thinking of the next day and how we can get to work...
The world is celebrating and i feel proud to be American today. I feel lucky to be a part of history and a generation that is playing a role in shaping history. This will be something we look back at for years to come as our moment in history..like the JFK generation, the MLK years, landing on the moon, defeating the Germans in WWII, Abraham Lincoln's Gettysburg Address...i think until yesterday, our generation has had far too few moments to be proud of...this one makes me proud.

Remembering that this man can't change things alone is key and being able and willing to work as a collective whole will be the key for the next (8 years?)...It seems that this could potentially fuel amazing shifts in our entire global world...that this could inspire more than the US to make change...

my mom was beside herself last night as she finally felt heard and recognized...i have never heard my mom so happy about a political outcome...ever... This is truly a great moment in our history to remember...we can, as a whole, decide to work together....

Imagine when President Obama walks through the door as a representative of the United States of America, and not some bumbling jack ass who can't form a sentence....imagine what President Obama will say, do and inspire.


i am proud today.

Love and understanding.

Vote Muse

cricket, originally uploaded by Justin Davis Davanzo.

the first time i voted was in 1992 while I was a student at the University of Oregon...it was a novel idea that I could vote for something. I really didn't have a care in the world and I voted for Ross Perot because i liked his ears...really...and also, because i believed that Bill Clinton would win no matter what so what did it matter? Not the best way to think of things I suppose.

Flash forward 16 years...jeez...but this time the world is a different place...and i have spent time really trying to grasp the outcome of decisions we as a country are about to make. I don't pretend to be a political know it all or someone who volunteers to work for the campaign, but I will say that at this point, I have been more aware of the world during this time and this election than ever before...i really believe that no matter what happens, we are right smack in the middle of a huge historical day...if either candidate wins, it not only will have a profound effect on the mood of our country, but the next 4 years will be one dictated by today's decision. I think either candidate will face very difficult times no matter what and it won't change on a dime either way, but we will look back at this election as a time when we, as a whole, made decisions that changed the outcome of the world...maybe for better or maybe for worse.

I don't inherently believe in politics, but i do believe in the human spirit and if there was ever a time that our spirit was being tested it is right now. If Obama is elected, (and I don't know if he will be the best person, nor do I believe McCain would be the worst), I think it will at least trigger a hope in us that we need...a hope to help us through some very difficult times...an example that we can actually do things differently, a charge to our psyche...if McCain is elected, I think we will have a hard time as it will feel like we can't change things and who cares anymore. Again, McCain may be better for some and Obama better for some, and I do not say this to walk the politically correct line of not making an argument for my candidate, but i simply feel that one does represent a path of new hope and beginning and one does not....at least for me.

I guess my simple analogy in my simple world would be...if i were a young student and year after year I had an old teacher who didn't inspire me much, and then i had a choice to be with a new young teacher with tons of ideas and energy and fun...i would want to be in that class. That is not to say old teachers aren't wise and amazing sometimes, but there are times when we need a new face, a new idea a new class...

so for today, November 4, 2008...for the first time ever i say...vote...because we truly need the practice....and who knows...we may be on the final turn as a country, so why not make it a good one.


Love and Understanding.

Muse 9

matrix, originally uploaded by Justin Davis Davanzo.

I thought maybe my muse had slipped away...after a weekend of fantastic costumes and amazing food and long fall bike rides...It is amazing how we can all share a bit of each others life through these blog entries...from all over the world. I love the idea of someone sitting in a cafe in Florence sipping coffee reading this blog or writing in theirs...it connects the dots and holds us all together. What a great way to give to each other.

Well, after my stint as Paul Bunyan, or the Mountain Gnome, as Nita loves to call me...(cute eh?) i have hung up the axe and gone back to my creative roots as a writer and photographer, although i did enjoy walking around with a very large beard and drinking from a straw. The thought that it is already November 3 and the time change has occurred is simply awe inspiring..time is flying by so quickly. Life has a way of doing that. We relished in maybe our last fall bike ride with warm weather yesterday, up into the mountains through the orange, yellow and red leaves and as often as possible, we made sure to ride through the leaves on the ground so we could smell and hear them crunch below. It will most likely snow here wednesday and with it bring a slower pace and a hibernation of winter, although we fully intend to ski as much as possible.

we discussed the idea of how life changes so quickly and for now we are going to embrace our time in it before little ones come along, which will be magic I am sure. As i see so many of my dear friends and family who have little ones embracing the rapid times of their new lives...they are amazing.

So as the day begins, and a new month brings us closer to the next year, I am feeling comfortable in this life and what it has in store....

Down the Hill:

a smile comes across my face
as i glide effortlessly
with conviction and focus.
a part of me is left behind
as i look ahead and see clearly, the road twists and
turns and bends with grace.
i take the shortest way
watching the white lines stretch
out in front of me as i
am flying, free with no one
to slow me down. i converge
on myself being a child with
no cares in the world.
i am free.
i am free.

Love and understanding

Paul in action....notice the beer in one hand and the axe in the other...shortly after this shot was taken, i was run out of town by the local boulder tree huggin association...but i managed to still cut down one or two...with my cardboard axe...