Saturday, August 8, 2009

the art of doing everything and nothing

Classic 1, originally uploaded by Justin Davis Davanzo.

I have felt lately that i have a blessed talent to be good at many things...I think due to my ability to learn things quickly, i tend to enjoy them faster. i am not saying by any means that I can do anything I want, but through life I have noticed that if I want to do something and I set my physical being to it, I can usually pick it up fairly quickly...its just the way I was wired...but with that comes a curse that I have found plagues me to this day...i think I will call this curse the "what the hell am I going to do with my life when i grow up?" curse....

I know it sounds like I am being a bit hard on myself, but the perspective of the cliche, "Jack of all trades, Master of none." could not be closer to the truth for me. It doesn't necessarily mean that I am not happy about it, or resentful, I love all that I have done and can do and wish i had more time to do them all...all the, it is just that at times, I wish I could narrow it down a bit more so that I could focus on one or two things...i sometimes envy those who have found that one passion that they are really entrenched in. Of course, they may be saying, man, i wish I could do those 10 things well....of course it is always the way...we are always wishing we had what we don't so how do we change that to a positive?

I am not really sure, but as I have lived a short life relatively, i have had the pleasure to stay open to things that I know nothing about and just do them....just take a chance and go for it and not worry about if you are good or bad or strong or weak....just doing them and trying them and finding that you really like it...

Of course there are a few things in life that i feel like I have gotten really good at....Acting, Cycling, Skiing, Photography...those are a few that come to mind...i think there are many others, but those are some of my top performing talents...meaning, I feel that I am strongest at those four.

so what is my point? my point is some days I feel like i am doing everything and doing nothing...meaning that I am not sure what good any of it is. I think i am judging myself and being hard on myself about it but that is just the way it is right now. I am trying to enjoy all the things I enjoy and not put too much pressure on becoming more focused, but i must say, there are those days where i get overwhelmed and can't do anything, because I can't even decide where to start....i guess that is just normal.

for now, I'll just keep doing i suppose...just getting up and doing and trusting and learning.

maybe doing nothing is stronger than everything once and a while.

Love and Understanding.

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